The deep parts of my life pour onward, as if the river shores were opening out. – Rainer Maria Rilke
Everyday we move, shifting our things from box to home. Like new lovers, we fumble around this space, pretending to know what we’re doing, that we’ve always belonged. But life these last few days has been anything but natural. While our bodies and most of our objects are here, we are currently living without an operating oven or stove, without a microwave or dishwasher, without one of our two bathrooms, without the internet (until today). This translates to living with a refrigerator, one bathroom, running water, walls, beds, and all of our accoutrements. Don’t worry: it won’t be this way for long (insert: crossed-fingers and a nervous laugh).
Today, as I unpacked boxes of books, I paused to flip through a few favorites and read these words in Rilke’s Selected Poems–a timely reminder of the deeper movement occurring in us right now. Even in the mess and chaos and series of withouts, the deep parts of us pour onward.
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I’m making this my mantra as I move again. This will be my fourth move in two years…. I feel like my whole life is in flux but stale at the same time. In these “stuck” years and forced moves, my spirit and Spirituality have grown so much. I feel like I’ve been storing up deep wells to pour out in the next stage of my life.
I think of my life these past couple years as a garden. I’ve been weeding and digging up the dirt. Laying down good soil. And waiting…. the water is coming soon.
Yes! Such a rich, life-giving mantra. Four moves? Oh I really emphathize, Kate. A garden analogy is so appropriate on so many levels. Blessings to you as you wait for water.
You write so beautifully my friend!
Thank you, sweet Corina. x
beautiful. photos. words. picturing the way your family is living in what your post brings to mind. all of it.
these days without will likely be some of the most memorable days of your entire time in that house. it actually sounds sort of nice… living a bit old school and pioneer-esque. i always envied those families who go on those PBS reality series where they leave their modern lifestyle and go out to the middle of nowhere to live like the pioneers did. i know i wouldn’t last too long, though. but it would be fun to try!
there might be quite a great lesson in these days for you in how to live going forward… once you have back all your creature comforts again. knowing the you we see on your blog, you will find that lesson and beauty will come of it.
I admit, although I had cell phone usage, it was nice to be without the internet for a few days. And there’s something about a forced industrial-simplicity that makes me both grateful and full. Things certainly feel a little too disorganized for my taste right now, but I agree with you that I will always remember these years. Thank you for your encouragement, Georgia.
I love this quote! Like receiving a life preserver after you’ve fallen overboard!
Yes, a bit like that. You’ll have to read the entire poem, beautiful and brief. Love you, mom.
you are such a talented writer, friend. you will feel settled before you know it and all will feel as if it always was. :)
xx amanda
thank you for the kindest words and encouragment, Amanda. I appreciate you. xo
“Even in the mess and chaos and series of withouts, the deep parts of us pour onward.” amen. beautiful words, as always, friend. Appreciate your heart and encouraging nature.
Said as you encourage me. Thank you so much, Kaylan. x